Schule-poo

I ripped the kids out of school, because, hey! they weren't learning anything anyway.  Stupid school.  At least 2 years behind.  123+321 was an actual problem my fifth grader had for homework at the end of the year.

I did everything by the book.  I selected a school with high principals and a mission statement that would knock anyone's socks off.  I visited the school, I asked questions.  I got answers.  They promised that they worked with each student individually on their level.

But in the end it didn't happen.  My kids were actually tutoring the other kids and learning nothing new.  They were bored out of their minds.  I spoke with the teacher.  I spoke with the teacher again.  I gave recommendations to the teachers.  I started supplementing at home.  I expanded the given assignments.  Still...nothing was being taught or expected of my children.  They would turn in a poo paper and the teacher would write "brilliant" on it...thus ruining my directions that they needed to do their best regardless of what everyone else's best was around them.  I went to the principal.  I went to the superintendent.  In the end, everyone agreed.  Their school just wasn't able to provide my children with a decent education.

But here is what the school taught my children:

to be disrespectful.  They had no discipline problem so children just acted out without any repurcussions.  As you can imagine this resulted in a terrible learning environment as the teachers were never able to teach.  Slowly small misbehaviors slipped into my kids.

low work capacity:  work?  Effort?  what are those?  My kids forgot that expectations are set a little high so that they have to reach up to meet them.

Laziness:  my kids got lazy.  No matter how much I harped on "do your best!" and told their teachers that I expected better...in the end, my kids could turn in some effortless piece of junk and be told that they were amazing!!  Weeeeee!

loss of critical thinking skills:  I don't know how it is possible to unlearn your ability to learn.  But it happened.  My kids don't know how to process information anymore.

contention:  never has there been so much contention and fighting and huffing and puffing.  You wanna know why?  Because I wouldn't tolerate any of the above in my home!  I supplemented.  I gave my own assignments.  I sat down and wrote papers with them.  I forced them to read age appropriate books.  I told them that their teachers were full of crap when they gave them good grades on poorly done assignments.  I wouldn't take the attitudes.

In the end...the big result was that our family had met it's capacity for challenges.  It didn't help that our landlord NEVER fixed anything in out home.  That wing with the pool?  Unusable the entire time.  Our trashcans were still the mini size for 2 person families...and we had 6 people!  Church?  Well, let's just say it is difficult to learn anything when you are listening to it in a foreign language half the time.  Also, the same behavior issues at school existed in church...because it was a Bremen thing apparently.  I realize that someone may read this from church and think I'm a horrible person for saying it...but you recognized the behavior issues yourself.

We prayed and decided we couldn't stay there any longer.  So, we checked out the other nearest international school, we developed a backup plan for us to move back to the states and we tried in vain to get permission to do an online american school program.  In the end the best solution was for us to relocate to Hamburg if the company would allow it.  After pushing for an answer for months we finally got one the day before school started...we could move.

We didn't have a house and the school was over an hour away.  But we went.  They just happened to have places for our kids...which was a miracle.  Unheard of.  I drove that drive every day with a 2 year old in tow.  I hung out until school was over and volleyball practices were done in the evening...with a 2 year old.

A TERRIBLY UNHAPPY TO BE IN THE CAR TWO YEAR OLD.

So, I did what I didn't want to do with this loving and attached child...I enrolled him in a part time preschool.  He hated that at first, too...because I wasn't there.  Eventually he grew to love it.

Now we have a lovely house.  My children report that this school is much better and the kids are better behaved!

We have seen improvement in our children's attitudes.

But there is still ironing out to be done.

The main problem with this arrangement is that my husband drives every day to work in Bremen.  And he gets home sometimes after the kids have gone to bed.  And he leaves before they wake in the morning.  But at least we have the weekends.

I'm pretty much a single mom most of the time, though I have done that role before.  I just hate it.

I bet you are asking the question I ask myself all the time...how did we get here?  I don't know.  I think I put my foot down in the beginning, but no one took it seriously.  I showed them that I was serious, and they still didn't take me seriously.  I should have jerked them out sooner.  But I wasn't anxious to split up our family.

I keep evaluating the situation trying to learn from it.  I think I learned this...when it comes to my children and their education and salvation, I am in charge.  Even if we currently live in a country that thinks THEY are in charge that is wrong.  I am in charge.  No amount of bullying or telling me that it isn't my right to be concerned over my children (and yes!  that was said at both school and church!) is going to slow me down again.  I kind of let these attitudes put the breaks on my actions and in the future there just isn't time to lose when it comes to my children's education or spiritual upbringing.

I'm in charge!

I'm their parent!

And I'm not sticking around to find out if you improve once you have shown me you aren't good enough.  If I do, then I have learned nothing from this experience and I'm not a very good parent.

So, now we are in Hamburg!