girlcationation

I've looked back through my blog and have noticed that my exciting posts and enthralling writing has turned to little more than drivel. Wasted words and wasted space. I think that being in Doha seems to be altogether uninspiring to me. At first I thought it was just because I had already 'experienced' the firsts that come along with living in a new country like Oman and that moving from one arab country to another must mean that I skipped those 'firsts'. But that isn't it...these are two different places. Then I thought maybe I was less inspired because I didn't have to be as creative with 'finding' things that my family needed...but the grocery store and general shopping situation here is pretty much the same - altogether a pain in my what has now become a 'big rear'. Then I thought that maybe I felt less inspired because I didn't have a calling here (church job-except you don't get paid.) that required any direct inspiration from God and I felt further away from my creator thus my creative side was suffering. But then I got a calling and that didn't change anything. Anyway, I can't put my finger on what it is here...but my artistic creative side is excrutiatingly BLAH lately! I've always firmly believed that in order to tap into the side of artistic genius (and there have been a few moments when I have reached that...I'm saying this modestly...truly) I have to be in a continual state of learning. This is why I love school so much. This is why I have a closet full of different shoes and items that are needed for different hobbies. Learning makes me alive. Learning makes me learn more. I think I'm out of practice of learning. I definitely need some changes...and those changes are coming. I'm so excited.

Some ladies at my church have gathered and planned a last minute girlcation. Just girls. No children. A change. A change for the better. Just thinking about it starts to lift some of those feelings of suppression off of my upper body, lightening the load on the lower as well. It is having a total body effect on me. This girlcation is going to be a total learning experience for me. I'll get to learn about all of the ladies I'm with...I'll get to learn about the places we're going...I get to learn about travelling with ladies...I'll get to learn about connecting with myself on a very different angle....from a very different perspective. A perspective I crave and long for - girl time. I have been very fortunate to have some amazing friends that I have come across in my theatre sojourn. Artistic friends are amazing. Here, in Doha, I am so far removed from that camaraderie that is formed when one labors together to create something for someone else and a higher purpose. In that way, theatre and service are so much alike. In Oman, I was able to do service projects and work with people to create something worthwhile...but here in Doha it is a little more difficult. I'll write an entirely different blog about that sometime...but I think I 'survived' Oman because I was able to form meaningful relationships by serving with others. I don't have that here...but maybe I can learn to get that in other ways. I'm learning. I'm learning. I'm learning. I'm discovering another person...or an old person that was there before, but not there on the surface any longer.

I'm coming back and I couldn't be more excited about it. Slowly I'm peeling away the layers that have clung to me and built up over time here in Doha...that have weighed me down crushing my spirit. I feel freer ... freedom is worth a price... and I'm prepared to pay it...

in the form of a beach and a fruity drink with galpals!